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| Dr. Grimwood, headmaster of Dedham School, thought to be by John Constable, painted early in his career. |
Extracts from Edward Henry Lisle Reeve's Commonplace Book.
Dedham Stories
Antics at Dedham School
There
is a good story told of Dr Grimwood the head master of Dedham School towards
the close of the last [eighteenth] century.
He had heard complaints from his housekeeper that some of the boys had
invented a most ingenious way of getting at the apples which she always kept –
safely as she had hoped – under lock and key.
They would let down a small schoolfellow in a basket into the room by
the chimney; and at a given signal from him, which he gave when the basket was
loaded, they would pull up the golden store into the light of day. When a sufficient quantity of fruit had been
thus brought up from the mine, the boy himself would resume his seat in the
basket and they would pull him up again to share in the repast which he had so
materially assisted in obtaining. The
Dr, on hearing of this device, secreted himself one day in the apple chamber
and waited for the event. Soon a
rumbling was heard in the chimney, and the basket steadily and surely descended
with the small boy, whose dismay on seeing the Doctor may be more readily
surmised than described. Dr Grimwood in
a stern voice bade him to be perfectly quiet, and informed him that he (the
Doctor) himself would take the place of the apples on this occasion, and
ordered the boy, after the delay allowed for loading the basket, to call to his
comrades outside to pull up their booty as he was wont to do. The Dr seated himself in the basket, the boy
called as of yore that all was ready, and in obedience to a hearty tug on the
basket its occupant was speedily in mid air and plunged into the darkness of
the chimney. On the boys pulled, with a
will for they had felt that there was a larger share than usual of the good
things, and we doubt not that they were considering what should be the need of
the young adventurer for so faithfully executing the object to descent when
suddenly, as they watched for the rosy cheeked apple to issue forth from the
chimney top, to their dismay, they caught sight of the doctor’s wig and with a
shriek they let go the rope, and the old gentleman was precipitated to his
place of starting.
(Doubtless
it was a warning to the boys, but what a shaking for the doctor! And as he dropped hard upon the floor; so, no
doubt, he dropped hard upon the boys when he did meet them again.)
A
propos of school-masters, boys, and apples, there is a story of a boy who was
caught by his master clambering over the wall dividing the playground from the
master’s orchard, evidently with his mind intent on apples. “Where are you going to, boy?” cried the Dr.
in sonorous and awful tones. “Back
again, Sir”, replied the ready juvenile.
Mr Mules
Mr
Mules of Dedham is a celebrity about whom volumes might be written. Suffice it to say of his personal appearance
that he was of any height you please over 6ft 4in, and broad across the chest
in proportion. Had you ever had the
fortune to have been within a mile or so of him you would have remembered him
with awe, for his voice would have probably have stunned you. Not that it was disagreeable – it was
melodious as a bell. It was the terror
as it was the admiration of the surrounding neighbourhood.
He
married a baronet’s widow – Lady Pilkington – and during the minority of her
three daughters led the life of a true born Briton. Mr Mules was formerly in medical practice at
Dedham, and attended Sir E Pilkington in his last illness. He kept two packs of hounds, and was the life
of the district.
His
vast proportions and dimensions while they raised him physically seem no less
to have raised him mentally above his fellow men – at any rate in his own
estimation. One of his laments was that
he was “surrounded by asses” an expression which has since become
proverbial. He walked about with an
immense black stick, as thick as one’s arm, and was usually accompanied by a
huge black dog.
There
is a story related to him which goes far to show his insight into human
nature. His garden was one night robbed
of some of its choicest peas by some unknown hand, and over these the gardener,
as was natural, made long and bitter lamentation. No clue however could be found as to the
thief, and time wore on. One fine day
the gardener again made his appearance to say that, as bad luck would have it,
some plums had vanished as suddenly and as mysteriously as the peas. Now, curiously enough, as on the day of the
departure of the peas, there was to be a dinner party that evening, and Mr
Mules began to smell a rat. “That same
rascal”, he said, “that stole the peas stole the plums also”. And, looking at his watch, he gave the man
warning to be off the premises in half-an-hour.
Out of the mouths of
babes
It
is related of Charles Manning of Dedham – neighbours of Capt. Reeve and his
family were the Mannings – that he went out to dine somewhere with his mother
when a small boy. His master would seem
to have been dilating upon the peculiarities of the people they were likely to
meet with more freedom than judgement, for she was somewhat confused when, in
the middle of the repast, her progeny turned to her and said, “Mamma, Mr Waly’s
nose is not nearly as big as you said it was”. (Enfant terrible! Ed.)
Mr Constable
Mr
Constable – brother of the renowned Suffolk artist [John Constable (1776 -
1837)] – though uneducated, and without the advantages of that celebrity yet
shared his native talent, and it would show itself some times in his giving
vent to sentiments and expressions a little out of the common. One of his nieces complained that her little dog
was always breaking loose from his chain and getting away, sometimes even
following her to Church. “Some-how or
other he won’t be tied up” she said. “If
you hand him to me”, said the old gentleman, “I would tie him up that his hind
legs did not touch the ground”.
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